Hamburger

Matt and I hung out at the Viper Room last night. Morbid place, out-of-towners still put flowers and candles on the sidewalk in memory of River Phoenix. Saw Orlando Bloom trying to pick up a couple of leather men outside the men's room. Matt and I placed bets on how long it would take for the three of them to lock themselves in a stall.

Since Matt is in A.A. again, and I don't drink, we nursed a couple of Diet Cokes and smoked some great Colombian we got from Sally Kirkland at a party we went to last week.

My cell phone rang, the band was playing so I stepped outside to take the call, had to step over poor Doris Roberts who was passed out on the sidewalk (she's been a wreck ever since that little show of hers went off the air -- you'd think the sixteen Emmy's she got would temper her self destructive behavior). It was Diana reminding me that she was having a cocktail party tomorrow night. She also told me that the DVD commentary is a go but she has to see a dialogue coach since it's been so long since she had done any public speaking.

Back in the club, Matt was standing at the bar, I stopped him from getting a complimentary Screaming Orgasm and suggested we head over to Denny's for a bite to eat.

In the parking lot we were almost run over by Stockard Channing. Matt yelled out, "Look at me, I'm Sandra Dee!" Channing flipped us the bird and we laughed climbing into my '56 Ferrari 860 Monza and drove down Sunset to the restaurant.

Saw Mel Gibson at the counter, he was arguing with the clerk because his credit card was being denied...got a seat and ordered two burgers, bloody, and then told the waitress, Sunny, to keep the java coming ... told Matt about the Olsen Twin's script with the nude scene. He thinks it's money!

Scoffed down our burger's and watched as Gibson was hauled away screaming that he was going to bring down the wrath of Opus Dei on this establishment...left a big tip for Sunny and headed home.

Matt asked if he could sleep in my bed with me tonight, I agreed provided he used one of these..