This crazy heatwave in Cali has been causing all kinds of wacky things to happen, Poor Lyndsay Lohan had heatstroke, Mel Gibson got drunk and went on a tirade (showing his true colors, I might add), and Doris Roberts is back in rehab; but the big story, is the love story of the decade that features the triad of Matthew McConaughey, Lance Armstrong, and Jake Gyllenhaal.
Good golly, ya can't go anywhere these days without bumping into these boys, riding their bikes, or shopping for trinkets, or just sunning themselves . Just this morning I caught a glimpse of Matt and Lance jogging down the street ... of course everyone knows that Matt is a switch hitter, but what did Sheryl Crow do to Lance? But, hey, it's all good, welcome to the club Lance!The smart money out here says it's Matt and Lance all the way, and Jake is just the occasional piece of Swiss cheese in the sandwich... of course, that's all just speculation, love in La La Land blows like the Santa Ana winds ... none the less,
when you see this threesome come whizzing by you decked out in form-fitting spandex, give them a thumbs up, because true love is hard to find in Hollywood.And in related news, Matt and Lance are renting a home just up the road from Hank and I. Jakey filled me in on this piece of news when I bumped
into him at the Sheldrake Room the other night. Apparently, the boys like to sun themselves on the home's deck; I've caught my housekeeper, Guadalupe, snapping off pictures of the goings-on at the rented home with a digital camera with a tele-photo lens. She claims that she's just trying out a gift her son gave her, but I am pretty sure she's selling the snaps to the National Enquirer!Ain't love grand?
So the turkey baster love child of Tom and Katie has yet to be seen in public. Even
if Jada Pinkeet Smith and that chick from the sitcom claim to have seen it. Will Guadalupe solve this puzzle? Like I said, she's got her new camera and is putting the glad-rag biz on the back burner for a bit ("I am sick of making dresses for these skinny bitches, they don't have the hips, it's like designing the dress for a 12 year old girl", is how she put it in Women's Wear Daily), and says she is going to camp out in front of Cruise's compound until she snaps a few photos of the once and future king of Scientology!A belated Happy Birthday to noted He-Man, Action Star, and Sheldrake Room regular, Vin Diesel. Vinnie's birthday was on the 18th of July and Hank and I were invited to a private party that he held at the Las Vegas Hilton...now, I'd love to fill you all in on the details of this soiree, but unfortunately, I had to sign a waiver upon entering the hotel that night so, like they say, What Happens in
here's a picture of the birthday boy sleeping it off...Well, I am off to Paramount, where I am dropping off a couple of scripts I've been working on, and then it's off to visit my good pal, Eric Stillman, and his lovely wife, Erica, at their home in Malibu. The happy newlyweds are throwing, what promises to be, the party of the summer! I'll post about this when I get back.
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